With the Chompcast, we aim to deliver an insightful and unique perspective on gaming as we talk about our experiences with the games we play, recent gaming news that most affects our interests, and philosophical issues encompassing everything that involves video gaming.
"Kissing is messy."
- Morgan Barnes
Join us this week as we discuss the rise of the battle royale genre, Shea's final thoughts on Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice, an article about differences in musicians' brains, and why Morgan thinks girls are icky.
Recorded January 19, 2018
BOOM!
Big explosions illuminate the night sky as a cavalcade of people are stopped in the middle of the street, awe etched onto their stony faces. Their eyes reflect the dazzling array of colors as their ears are filled with a chorus of bursts. The smell of gunpowder fills the air, tantalizing the viewers into a state of nostalgia, as emotions and memories flood them reminding them of a time of childlike innocence and wonder.
In a barren field, about a half of a mile away from the procession of people, there are heaps of artillery shell tubes. They are towering and grand, offering balls of light to the night sky. Laid out in uniformity of rows and columns, the mini cannons await with eager jubilation to be of use. Whirling around them with lighted sticks, four people ignite the fireworks. The movement of lighting and escaping to safety in choreographed repetition appears to be an interpretive dance, conveying deeper and complex feelings for the world. Their faces gleam in the fading light of the fireworks.
This year starts out with a bang for Swordchomp! We start off 2018 with a packed episode of the Chompcast, eager to make this year our year. Joining us for the first Chompcast episode of 2018 is one of our dear friends, Rich Meister, a fun and intelligent fellow of destructoid.com. We discuss eight of the games we are most excited for in 2018, and we briefly mention the Nintendo Direct released at the beginning of the year. Prey and Nier: Automata are both games on our mind as we have finished them over our break, as we reflect on the positives and negatives of both. We include a Bio Break article that discussed two separate studies that investigate male insects that lose legs become more sexually successful as they invest more resources into their testes.
Recorded January 12, 2018
You are all sitting in your velvet-colored seats, having just returned from intermission of the first half of the awards show. This is the moment you all have been waiting for: the Game of the Year announcements. Your hosts, Fish, Josh, Morgan, and Shea, prepare their personal top 5 lists of their games they loved this year. The big finale is their debate on what the Swordchomp top 5 Games of the Year should be. There are some expected choices, as well as some huge curveballs. Thank you for your unending support this past year. Enjoy the last Chompcast of the year, and have a great New Year’s!
You are all sitting in your velvet-colored seats, having just returned from intermission of the first half of the awards show. This is the moment you all have been waiting for: the Game of the Year announcements. Your hosts, Fish, Josh, Morgan, and Shea, prepare their personal top 5 lists of their games they loved this year. The big finale is their debate on what the Swordchomp top 5 Games of the Year should be. There are some expected choices, as well as some huge curveballs. Thank you for your unending support this past year. Enjoy the last Chompcast of the year, and have a great New Year’s!
Ladies and gentlemen, the time is here. Please don your beautiful, elegant dresses and your snazziest tuxedos. Wear your fanciest ties and put on your best make-up. Rent a limousine, bring your exclusive tickets, and walk down the red carpet to the Daggertooth Awards, Swordchomp’s Game of the Year event!
We run through many categories of the first day of two, such as favorite character haircut, favorite character of 2017 you’d like to have a drink with, game of 2017 that best describes your sex life, favorite ecology, favorite character, favorite art direction, favorite boss, best sound design, favorite narrative, favorite gameplay mechanic, favorite soundtrack, favorite game this year that wasn’t released in 2017, and favorite gaming moment of 2017. Afterwards, we decide which games or characters get the coveted Daggertooth awards!
Come join the longest show in Chompcast history in all of its edited and unedited splendor, and please return tomorrow for day two of the Daggertooth Awards!
Also, any music enclosed from video games, we do not own.
Ladies and gentlemen, the time is here. Please don your beautiful, elegant dresses and your snazziest tuxedos. Wear your fanciest ties and put on your best make-up. Rent a limousine, bring your exclusive tickets, and walk down the red carpet to the Daggertooth Awards, Swordchomp’s Game of the Year event!
We run through many categories of the first day of two, such as favorite character haircut, favorite character of 2017 you’d like to have a drink with, game of 2017 that best describes your sex life, favorite ecology, favorite character, favorite art direction, favorite boss, best sound design, favorite narrative, favorite gameplay mechanic, favorite soundtrack, favorite game this year that wasn’t released in 2017, and favorite gaming moment of 2017. Afterwards, we decide which games or characters get the coveted Daggertooth awards!
Come join the longest show in Chompcast history in all of its edited and unedited splendor, and please return tomorrow for day two of the Daggertooth Awards!
Also, any music enclosed from video games, we do not own.
A very Merry Christmas to all of you! It has been a wonderful year here at the Chompcast. We wrap up the episodes of this year with talk of Wolfenstein 2, delving deep into our thoughts and opinions. Next on the agenda is our final Bio Break of the year, as we discuss fish orgies and their deafening effects on dolphins. Finally, we answer a host of listener questions. Thank you for taking a beautiful ride with us this past year. We look forward to coming back next year better than ever! Stay tuned next week for our Game of the Year extravaganza!
"Timeout!!!"
The players trot to the bench, perspiring and exhausted, yet feeling determined and anxious. A few of the players look up at the scoreboard. It reads, 62-62 with 0:11 seconds left. The coach pulls out a whiteboard with some colored magnets, and he places them into position. He begins to whip them around the board, talking strategy of defense and offense. The players crouch over the board, as sweat drips from their brows and rains down onto the hardwood floor of the court. Holding their knees, they nod their heads as the coach fills their mind with a final play.
The coach gives them players a few short words of encouragement. "One stop," he says. Fatigue threatens to creep into the players' muscles, but the adrenaline of the close game keeps them alert and ready. The referee blows his whistle, filling the gym with the piercing sound of the game continuing. The players of both teams flood the floor. Each one begins to concentrate on what they need to do, focusing all of their minds on this moment.
The opposing team's player receives the ball out-of-bounds from the referee. The referee blows his whistle again. The opposing players begin their practiced movement, performing a play to get their star player the ball. It is successful, as the opposing star player grabs the ball. The defender stays in front of the star, shuffling his feet and keeping his hands out wide with his butt low. The star player fakes going left before tossing the ball to the right in a quick crossover move. The defender goes for the fake, leaving the star player with a straight drive to the hoop.
The star player looks up. 4 seconds left! He sprints to the basket as he dribbles, eyeing the rim with his peripheral vision. He picks up his dribble just below the free throw line. One defensive player, Morgan, steps away from his man to block the star player's drive to the hoop. He shuffles over, gathers his footing, and jumps straight into the air as the star player himself begins to jump. The star player soars above the defensive Morgan, catching him with his body. Morgan goes flying to the side, face frozen in anguish. The star player throws down a sick windmill dunk, shaking the rim and backboard. The ball flies through the net and smashes Morgan in the head as he lies on the ground in pain. The ball scares him and puts him further in pain. The shock of the pounding of the ball causes Morgan to piss all over himself and the court as he is knocked unconscious. The gym roars in cheers as the opposing team celebrates. Morgan's team mates rush over to help him, but see the puddle of urine and leave him soaking himself.
This week is completely jam-packed with content, as the end of the year approaches. First, we focus on the brief announcements of the PSX convention. We somehow manage to fit in talk of Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice, Resident Evil 7 DLC, Hollow Knight, Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, and Nier: Automata. We also cover Fish's Amiibo addiction, a bio break article involving chimpanzees and viruses, and a fantastic listener question. Enjoy the newest episode of the Chompcast, and as always, thanks for being a part of our community.
Recorded December 15, 2017
Vidya Gamez! Yay!
This week we discuss the Game of the Year Awards, Breath of the Wild, and Pyre.
Enjoy the show, and join us again next week when Josh will teach us how to sensually tie cherry stems into knots... with your hands... the way God intended.
Recorded December 8, 2017
You arrive at your camp, having traveled through forest and plains to reach it. You are exhausted, but the thrill of a new adventure reinvigorates you, encouraging you. In the clearing, you see a creature with its back turned to you. It seems to be busy, but with what, you do not know. You stroll over to it, ever curious. A yelp in fright greets you as the creature turns to face you. A dog!
The dog, having realized who you are, begins to wag its tail. This dog is peculiar, as it is standing on its two hind legs. It walks over to you, very human-like, and says hello. You are initially taken aback, having never met a talking animal before. It extends its paw, offering a shake of friendship. You grasp the paw in your own hand, shake it, and offer a warm hello in return.
The dog seems very happy to see you. It begins to show you around the campsite, as your excitement is building and building. It offers to help you with the formation of your camp, which you readily accept. The dog recommends that you build couches. Lots and lots of couches. You think to yourself, why? Why couches? You decide to go with the dog’s advice, and you build 10 different couches. The dog, ecstatic, lowers himself to all fours, and begins to run across the couches, hopping from one to another in frantic disarray. You watch in confusion and amazement as the dog runs and jumps for 5 minutes. Finally, it begins to settle down, as it falls asleep on a couch. You chuckle to yourself, and you set down your pack.
This week on the Chompcast, we have a fun and slightly contentious episode packed with talk of Animal Crossing mobile, Pyre, and Legend of Zelda: BotW. Our topic of the week is the recent controversy and the aftermath of EA, and how it affects the gaming medium as a whole. Lastly, we tie it off with a Bio Break of a fish that lives deep in the Mariana Trench.
Recorded December 1, 2017
Two of our heroes have taken on a mission of their own. After consulting a town’s mission board, Fish and Shea decide to go forward in time to save some unfortunate souls from the one and only, the Devil himself.
Donning VR helmets, they venture into the 1930s United States, a time ravaged by drought and the Great Depression. History was made during this era: the Empire State Building and Hoover Dam were constructed, the first World Cup occurred, multiple record-breaking flights were recorded by Amelia Earhart and Wiley Post, Donald Duck was introduced as a Disney character, and the beginning of World War 2. Fish spots two anthropomorphic cups frolicking through the streets, discussing strategy to defeat some unknown assailant.
The two heroes dart off into a back alley, opening up to a field littered with farms. They start to walk through the field, sensing something slightly nefarious. Suddenly, the Root Pack pops out of the earth. Moe Tato laughs, Weepy begins to sob uncontrollably in fear, and Psycarrot holds his orange head as he begins to concentrate with his eyes closed. Our heroes look to each other and pull out their finger guns.
While Shea and Fish are out fighting for souls, Josh and Morgan decide to hit a lake rumored to be loaded with massive fish. After looting some sturdy fishing poles from some fiends nearby (what?), they bait their hooks and cast them into the water. Almost instantly, both Morgan and Josh look some beastly aquatic animals. Morgan manages to yank his out first, hoisting it into the air with glee. “Finally, what I’ve always wanted!” Josh, mere seconds later, pulls with all of his might, nearly snapping the rod. A fish twice the size of both of them flops up onto shore. Josh gives a sideways glance over to Morgan and snickers. “Mine’s bigger.”
This week on the Chompcast, we have plenty to discuss, such as Fish getting a Switch, Shea playing Cuphead as well as Fish finishing the game, Shea’s brief experience with PS VR in a video game bar in Japan, Morgan’s and Fish’s time with Star Wars: Battlefront 2, and Morgan’s Holy Grail of a game; Final Fantasy 15 Monsters of the Deep. We also present the question of expectations versus reality in video gaming.
Recorded November 25, 2017
An alligator snapping turtle hops onto his fast, speeding motorcycle, grabbing Wumpa fruit as he passes them. He sees a ramp, and increases his speed as he aims towards it. He flies off through six rings floating in mid air. Below him the coastline stretches out into the distance, a single lonely house piercing the horizon. As he lands, his pockets feel a bit heavier; the rings have shrunk and magically transported there. The turtle revs his engine and... well... we wouldn’t want to spoil the ending for you, now would we?
Hello lasses and chums! Come join the chatter this week, as we discuss spoilers in gaming and our media. We end up all over the spectrum with this challenging question. From there, we discuss What Remains of Edith Finch, Shea finally manages to have his way with the Crash Bandicoot trilogy, we bait ourselves into a Sonic argument, and we have a Bio Break article about... you guessed it: an alligator snapping turtle! So if you are a fan of fictitious fruit, gleaming rings, gun fights, and divisive conversations, you’ve come to the right place.
Recorded November 17, 2017
This week we talk about how shooters are the worst. And also Wolfenstein 2.
We also discuss Super Mario Odyssey.
And we listen to Fish explain how he plays Golf Clash because he loves it and not because he's trapped, and they really love each other, and those bruises are because he's just clumsy and falls down sometimes.
Sit back. Relax. Get yourself a nice cold glass of hot cocoa. And enjoy the show!
Recorded November 10, 2017
The four heroes return to the tavern they once visited, after a lengthy few months of slaying monsters and travelling with various heroes. Josh throws his pack on an empty table and beelines straight to the bar for a pint. Fish sits down at the table, and begins to etch on a wrinkly parchment. Shea sets his stuff down and hurries off to the bathroom, holding his weak bladder for much too long. Morgan joins Fish at the table and motions to the head mistress to have her send his favorite girl. Within seconds, he falls asleep. As the mistress arrives, she stares at the passed out hero, and then looks at Fish. Fish looks up from his parchment, shrugs his shoulders, and then continues to write onto the paper. The mistress, angered that her time was wasted, slaps the napping hero in the back of the head, then ascends the stairs back to the second floor.
Rich, the bartender whips up four pints of his finest ales for the heroes. He joins Josh, as they begin to catch up on the tales of the creature eliminating. Josh tells of the heroes’ sagas, weaving story after story. Rich listens intently, and then primes Josh for a story of his own.
“There is a man that just entered our dusty town. No one has ever seen him before. He is unlike anything anyone has ever seen.”
Riveted, Josh sits at the end of his chair, gulping his beer. His eyes are widened, and a frothy, beery moustache gleams on his upper lip.
Rich continues, “He has been labelled one of the greatest monster destroyers this world has ever seen. But that’s not what makes him so odd.”
Rich, looked around, ensuring that no one was eavesdropping. Josh repeats Rich’s actions, almost looking to see if the strange creature he spoke of would suddenly pop up.
“No, what’s so odd about this man is---”
Suddenly, a group of 3 enemies burst into the bar, surprising everyone. They knocked over Fish and Morgan, tangling them with the legs of the chairs and tables. Some of the patrons fled for upstairs, fearing for their life. Josh went to draw his sword, but remembered that he had set it on the table in his weariness. Shea attempted to exit the bathroom to join the fracas, but locked himself in the bathroom and couldn’t get out.
A man burst into the tavern, wearing red overalls and a red hat. He donned a thick moustache, one not made of beer. The heroes looked to the man, and were greeted with, “Here we GOOOOOOOOOOO!”
Recorded November 3, 2017
You open your eyes, allowing your vision to adjust to your surroundings. Your vision is blurred, but slowly coming into focus. You are lying on your back, and you feel the occasional rock in your back and legs. You smell the air. A stale scent greets your nostrils. In the distance, you hear primal sounds. Near you, it is eerily quiet. You begin to cough as the air you are inhaling hurts your lungs. It tastes foul, as if something evil lurks here. Your vision comes into focus, and you notice the sky is darkened to a bluish-black hue. Ash rains down, further threatening your breathing.
You stand up from the hard ground and begin to look around you. You see the remnants of a bank, with the roof crumpled into the building. The front door clung to the wall by a single hinge, begging to escape the abandoned structure. Vines have grown over many of the old buildings and walkways. Not a soul is found here. "Where the hell am I?" you think to yourself.
You pass more buildings, yet no one can be seen or heard. You hear a rock tumble down a brick landslide on the side of a two story building. You frantically look around, suddenly hyper aware of your surroundings. In that moment, you realize that you are not alone. You start to run away as fast as you can. Your breath becomes labored, as adrenaline pumps through your body. You hear rustling behind you, but you don’t dare look back. You look for shelter anywhere. Oh God, I’m gonna die, you think over and over. A massive creature suddenly lands in front of you, causing you to fall down in fright. You attempt to scream, but nothing comes out. The creature skulks towards you until it reaches you. It is towering over your body. You feel the hot breath of the monster raining down on you. You can no longer breathe. The maw of the creature opens and you see rows upon rows of teeth. You close your eyes as you see the head of the creature descend upon you.
This week on the Chompcast, we bring back Firekeeper to discuss the question, Which conventions have we always wanted to go to? Next, there is more talk of Destiny 2, as Josh and Shea have finally both played the game. There is some non-spoiler discussion of both Stranger Things the Game and Stranger Things season 2. Make sure you grab your walkie talkie and turn to the right channel, so you can hear the latest episode!
Recorded October 27, 2017
Kick, punch, it’s all in the mind.
If you wanna test me, I’m sure you’ll find
That the things I teach ya
Is sure to beat ya... uhhhhh... wait... wrong fighting game. My bad. Let me try again.
RIIIIIIISE... from your graaaaave! Damn it. Not what I was looking for. One more try.
Fatality! There we go!
With the help of our guest Tony, we nurse our bumps and bruises this week as we grapple with this week’s topic: fighting games. More specifically, we pose the question, “What do fighting games in the future need to do to appeal to wider audiences?” After getting hit with an upper cut, we delve into our time with Evil Within 2, even more Cuphead talk (somehow), and Josh tells of Hollow Knight. Come check out this week’s episode, and GET OVER HERE!
Recorded October 20, 2017
You come upon an old camp, recently deserted as it was filled with bones and torn flesh specks. Prompted as you know you are close, you follow them. You are riding on a steed recently procured from Rohan. You have rode over 12 days in search of the fleeing orcs. Your war party is close behind, but you have rode ahead to scout the filthy enemies. You smell their putrid stench as you gallop in their wake. Footfalls litter the ground as the orcs pounded their heavy feet, scuttling away from the angered humans. You see them in the distance, and push your horse to the brink, wanting revenge for the attack on your village. In your blind rage, you do not detect the two Warg riders lying in wait nearby. They ambush you, as the lieutenant slays you, disembowelling you and laughing as the Warg rips you apart.
You wake up suddenly back at the camp, remembering that you were just murdered. Confused, you chase after the orcs again. You spot them in the distance. You remember the ambush duo and prepare yourself. You see the two orcs on their Wargs. One yells to the other, “Captain, he knew we were here.” You think to yourself Captain???
This week, we discussed the topic of loot boxes, as they have seemed to permeate almost every gaming title as of late. Morgan discusses his time with Shadow of War. We managed to fit in some Cuphead and Destiny 2 talk, as well as Shea discussing his time with the Stranger Things mobile game and a fan-made Crash Bandicoot 2d game.
Recorded October 13, 2017
“Heeeeeeeey, Ms. Brown. Get our guest a glass of water, please!” Listen. No need to come into the office packing a heater. How’s about you and me open into this hooch, and you can listen to my story? That sweet patootie out there… she used to be a different person. She used to be a canary, living the fast life when she became a junkie. It was common to see her begging for a Cadillac, running through it in a few days. She was on the fast track to end up in a Chicago overcoat. This Dick happened to walk in one day and take notice to her. I got her some help, getting her treatment. Now, she reaches for the City Juice instead of the powder. So let me ask you something… what can I do for you?
We channel our inner Willy as we delve into the game that is hot off the press: Cuphead. We were all enthralled with the game’s vivid style and throwback personality. The game was so inspirational that it prompted our question for this week: how do we personally feel about difficulty within a game? We also briefly delved into Sonic Mania and Little Nightmares. Grab yourself some hooch, and sit down with a smooth episode of the Chompcast.
Recorded October 6, 2017
Hello, listeners! So nice of you to join us. This week, we had a very special guest: Jason, the brilliant mind who designed our beautiful logos that you see weekly. He brought with him the topic of friendships built in gaming, which prompted a wonderful discussion among the crew. From there, Shea discussed his time with Sonic Mania, while the crew weighed in with final thoughts. Jason wanted to talk some original Destiny, which the crew (especially Fish) happily obliged. Morgan and Shea briefly discussed the new Star Trek: Discovery first two episodes. And don’t worry, listeners, we didn’t forget to include a discussion about Mario laying pipe.
Recorded September 30, 2017
Guns, guns, and gravity. We keep it interesting this week as we discuss more prevailing thoughts regarding Destiny 2. Josh and Morgan bring Samus back to our minds as they converse about their time with Metroid: Samus Returns. Shea finally returns to video gaming after his months-long adventure in mobile gaming land with more Gravity Rush 2 talk.
Also on the docket, we discuss how mood affects our time gaming, whether it is about comfort food or mood dictating which games we play and why. Come join us for another exciting episode of the Chompcast!
Recorded September 22, 2017
