Idrisil - Ep. 89

BOY, you better come on and listen to this show, as Kratos and Atreus grace the gaming world with their presence. Wow, this game is incredible, so we had to get our boy Rich Meister in on the discussion. He brought along our topic of the week: our first gaming moment. The stories are varied and invigorating. After the God of War and main topic, we discuss our social media polls and a bio break regarding a rediscovered mammal thought 30 years extinct.

Also, we are pleased to announce that Sword Chomp finally has a Patreon page. If you feel so inclined, we would be very grateful to have your support.

Recorded April 27, 2018

Lutefiskedopolis - Ep. 88

Hark ye! Hast thou ever heard the tale of pillage?
Of pillage and plunder? Do well and listen, ye dog
Let me regale a tale so fierce and fabled
Forever etched upon the mind of you, listener
Four sea dogs set sail to capture untold treasures
Like the hawk who clutches its prey in sharp talons
They sought to grasp the riches, riches, riches
They knew not what troubles awaited on perilous waters

O’er yonder, there laid on the bright and vast horizon
O’er yonder, a ship whose crew were caught unawares
O’er yonder, the four set sail, full speed ahead
O’er yonder, gold and gems, their eyes were set to bear
Was it with remorse or lust that they looked to acquire
The wealth of a man’s kingdom within the hull
Wooden, wainscoted, waterborne, a man’s treasury
Emptying his coffers, livelihood forever purloined

Ne’er a thought the pirates across the waters would starve
Scraping for food off the streets, dirtied and worn
Sea dogs becoming stray dogs, begging for table scraps
No, there wasn’t a single thread of remorse
Only a gleam or glimmer had shone in the four’s eyes
Awaiting destiny for too long stirred a lust so unquenched
They blasted the hull of the ship, laying waste and carnage
Blood and water mixed, like it had so many times before

The four had sunk the enemy, had secured the treasure
Their lust and greed had been fulfilled upon this day
Guns shot in the air in triumph, the sound of victory
Suddenly, the sky grew dark, the clouds ominous
The sea stirred; water swirled and raged; the wind
Gusted and blew, tearing the mast straight off the vessel
A whirlpool began to form next to the four
Well, ho! Look there! Something emerged from the deep

White hair, long and straight, sat atop a giant with a beard
A crown of gold garnished the giant’s regal head
A trident, massive and sharp, was held next to the king
Here now was the god of the seas, the fearsome Poseidon
He stared long and hard at the four, pondering
What his response would entail, pondering
He raised his trident, how mighty it looked in the skies
And brought it down, crashing down, killing the four

This week on the Chompcast, we could just not tear ourselves away from Sea of Thieves, as we had yet another adventure. We also managed to talk about mythology in video games, both in setting and influence. We cover an interesting Bio Break regarding the discovery of 30+ new species in a previously-undiscovered area of the ocean. Last, we cover the activity of the social media landscape and a listener email. Hark, ye!

Recorded April 20, 2018

Scum and Villainy - Ep. 87

Pitch black.  Cold.  Metallic.  The taste of iron is faint.  The smell of blood in the air.  Breath inhaling and exhaling.  A person sits in a room bound. It can see nothing anywhere, as the room is surrounded in complete darkness.  If someone were to sneak up behind and slit the prisoner’s throat, they would never see it coming.  The taste of blood is fresh, floating in the room, permeating its nostrils.  Suddenly, the prisoner hears a maniacal laugh from a room near him, piercing through the tight walls.  Another deeper, malevolent laugh comes from another location within the ward.  The prisoner wears a wry grin on its face, as it lets out a bloodcurdling laugh of its own, contributing to the cacophony of evil.
Yes, as you may have surmised, this week we discuss villains in video games.  What makes a villain good?  What are some of our favorites?  We spoke of our sea-faring adventures in Sea of Thieves, discussed some listener polls, and held a secret section that Shea and Josh refused to tell the other two hosts. 

Recorded April 13, 2018

More Equal Than Others - Ep. 86

Ten pirates boarded the ship as the cannons blasted, blowing iron into the water and into the hull of the enemy boat.  Swords clanked together, steel meeting steel in combat.  Corpses began to pile up on the wooden floor, blood leaking through the cracks and pouring to the hull below.  The sounds of cannon firing and gun shots blared on the open seas, as the dying calls of the clashing pirates managed to cut through the cacophony. 
The enemy pirates began to overtake the ship, forcing the shipmates of the boarded vessel to wave the white flag of surrender.  The enemies tied up the remaining pirates who managed to stay alive.  The captain of the rogue vessel steps onto the boarded ship.  Without a word, he gives the execute signal.  One of the enemy pirates wielding a gun pulls out a gun and blows away two of the surrenderers with no remorse.  One of the pirates begins to blubber and weep openly, not wanting to die.  The captain laughs at the sight.
Suddenly, a helicopter appears on the horizon.  The pirates from both parties look with confusion and dismay as the winged vehicle approaches at a breakneck speed.  As it gets closer, the pirates hear someone yelling, “Yee haaaaawwwwwwwwwwwww!”  The helicopter stops above the ship, as the wind from the propeller rains down on the pirates, making them scramble for cover.  Suddenly, a horse leapt onto the deck of the ship with a man on top double-wielding rifles and wearing a cowboy hat.  On his brown jacket, there was a pendant in the shape of Montana.
This week’s podcast was discombobulated in the best way possible, as we talked about Sea of Thieves, Far Cry 5, listener polls, and the question of the week: should video games have to say “something”?

Recorded April 6, 2018

Stool Snapple - Ep. 85

This week, we talked about something... but Josh cannot remember.  He stares longingly into Fish’s eyes.  Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.  Besides the galaxies that exist in Fish’s irises and pupils, we discussed games as a service, something that is popping up and is fairly new to us gamers.   We looked for an exit as we played A Way Out.  We began to plunder the seas as Morgan spoke of his initial happenings with Sea of Thieves.  Lastly, Shea was over the moon as Morgan and he discussed playing Shining Force 2.  Next week, we will discuss how to properly lick and seal an envelope.

Recorded March 30, 2018

A Way Out - Ep. 84

The white, sterile hospital room is empty, save for someone.  It lays there on the table, seemingly lifeless.  Upon further inspection, the rise and fall of the chest can be seen as it continues to breathe through shallow, controlled breaths.  A gown covers it as it lays on its side unconscious and waiting to be operated on.  Its mind begins to dream of a time already passed.
It was running through a forest, darting and weaving through the underbrush.  A blur was ahead of it, barely keeping pace as it attempted to flee.  It could smell its flesh, a succulent scent gracing its nostrils.  It could barely contain its excitement and hunger as it continued the chase.  It let out a screeching roar, alerting the blur and anyone else in the forest that it would soon be dining on the meat of a smaller creature.  Leaping forward with its large claws attached to its hind legs, it pinned the blur down.  The smaller dinosaur attempted to break free as the velociraptor watched for a few seconds, reveling in its success.  It brought down its razor-sharp teeth, rending the tough exterior of the smaller dinosaur, and biting into the sweet taste of flesh and blood.
Now, the velociraptor was in a hospital full of medical tools and doctors dying of cancer.  Long past were the days where it would hunt for food, as it was slowly wasting away.  The doctors had planned a last ditch effort to save the velociraptor by performing a unique kind of surgery to remove the tumors plaguing its body.  The doctors stormed in, roaring and showing their gleaming teeth that were the size of daggers. They adorned gowns and eye coverings, in case of blood splatter.
They began to wash their claws in sinks that were so high up on the wall that they almost touched the ceiling.  They heard a stir, turning around to see the velociraptor wake up from its unconscious state.  It seemed as if the anaesthesia was wearing off.  One of the doctors began to prepare a second dose.  Another doctor moved to the velociraptor, checking on the cancerous dinosaur.
“Please…” the velociraptor whispered, barely managing to say the words, “give me… a hand.”
The velociraptor looked up at the doctor, meeting its gaze. What stared back at it was a large t-rex waving its stubby arms and shrugging.
This week on the Chompcast, we were deep into the world of co-op as it was our main topic of discussion.  The topic was prompted by our main game of this week, A Way Out.  Morgan and Josh continued their onslaught of the Donkey Kong series, moving on to Donkey Kong Country 2.  Somehow, for only God knows why, we managed to squeeze out even more Monster Hunter World talk.  That’s your show, so jump on it!

Recorded March 23, 2018

Fishen Lagann - Ep. 83

Mechs mechs mechs.  That is the obsession on this week’s Chompcast, as we are still helplessly addicted to the glory that is Into the Breach, Subset Game’s tactical rogue-like game.  With Josh rejoining us this week, we have a full-fledged discussion.  Morgan tells us tales about his rekindled love of Donkey Kong, as well as his engagement story to his fiancé (congrats, ya bastard).  We have some silly polls from the Instagram, and one serious one as we attempt to sound educated regarding artificial intelligence.  Of course, we can’t forget the topic of this week, as we discussed games that sounded “bad” to us on paper, only to end up being a well-liked to coveted experience for us.  The topic was bolstered by comments from you, the listeners.  As always, thank you for your continued support and love for the show.

Recorded March 16, 2018

My Art Will Go On - Ep. 82

A man sits in the muck as rain pours down in gallons.  He weeps and shouts to the sky, letting out his anguish to the world.  Broken and hurt, the man cannot contain himself as he is on his knees in front of his dead parents.  He knows that it is dangerous to stay out in the open as looters are wandering about, but he does not care.  The outside world is no longer important to him.  In this moment, death and loss are the only concepts engulfing his mind.

His sword sits at his waist, sheathed in leather and waiting to be of use.  It continues to listen to the man sob uncontrollably for his loved ones laying in front of his body.  It hears footsteps approach, followed by a few chuckles.  It feels its master rustle, standing up to face the strangers.  A hand is placed on the sword, being drawn as the visitors and the man exchange words.  Water begins to fall upon its steel, and it sees a cloudy sky.  Carnage surrounds it, as buildings are caved in, burned, and smoking.  People lay dead in the streets.  It sees the parents of the man, eyes closed, yet frozen in expressions of anguish and misery.

The man steels himself, ready to fight the gargantuan looter with a hammer.  The looter charges at the man, pulling his arm back, ready to strike the shorter man.  A laser cuts through the right side of his chest, shooting out the other side.  The blow singes the flesh of the looter, as he drops his hammer and free falls to the ground.  No sound emanates from the gargantuan attacker as he lays face down in the mud.  The other four looters frantically look around in shock, attempting to find the source.  A mech appears from nowhere, punching one of the looters into the other.  The power of the blow explodes the two colliding looters, covering the area with viscera and blood.  The remaining two attempt to run away when a missile explodes in between them, thrusting them into buildings, breaking their bones.  They crumble into a heap, where they lay shattered and dying.

Three mechs appear close to the man with the sword.  One mech opens and appears a woman wearing futuristic clothing.  “You are safe now,” she assures the man.

This week on the Chompcast, we have our good buddy, Rich Meister, on to join the festivities of discussing Kingdom Come Deliverance, Into the Breach, and Monster Hunter World.  We tackled our most controversial topic to date after being prompted by multiple media outlets: can we separate the art from the artist?  Morgan discussed a few of his questionable polls off of social media, and we included listener responses.

Recorded March 9, 2018

Holey Diver - Ep. 81

Morgan and Fish bust out of their tree cabin, hopping to the earthly jungle floor. The sounds of birds squawking ring through the leafy giants, as the smell of fruit permeates the air. Bananas are not hanging from the trees or vines, but instead floating in midair. This perplexes the two, not understanding how yellow fruit could be suspended in the air.

“I don’t understand physics,” Morgan admits to Fish.
“You don’t understand much of anything,” Fish retorts through a stifled laugh.

Morgan slaps him in the back of the head, then begins to run through the jungle on all fours, fists clinched and landing on the ground in repetition with his feet. Fish fixes his red hat on his head and follows closely behind. Jumping into the bananas, they begin to collect the delicious fruit. It is unsure at this time where the bananas are stored, but that’s not a part of the story. Morgan and Fish leap onto a raised platform when they run into a crocodile pacing back and forth on its hind legs nefariously. The two panic and hop off of the platform. They look up and see a floating K medal above the middle of the platform.

“Seriously, what the hell is up with this jungle?” Morgan quizzically offers to Fish. Fish scoffs, and stares at the medal. Concocting a plan, Fish takes a banana out of his pocket and throws it at the medal, hoping it will fall down to hit the crocodile. Nothing happens. Fish takes another banana out of his (endless???) pocket and throws it at the crocodile. It hits the crocodile, which seems unfazed by the long, sweet fruit bouncing off of its exterior.

“Quit monkeying around!” Morgan yells at Fish. Fish rolls his eyes harder than the rotation of the round earth (the earth is round people; come on!!!).

This week, there was a surplus of subjects to discuss as Shea and Morgan discuss their short time thus far with Kingdom Come Deliverance. As a result of their time with it, it prompted this week’s gaming topic: glitches in video games and how they have impacted us, for better or worse. Morgan finally was able to convince Fish to spend some time playing Donkey Kong Country for his first time ever. Yeah. “How?” is what we thought as well. This week’s Bio Break article was arguably our most contentious, yet informative, as we discussed scientists creating a digital and model version of an existing sea slug. Lastly, we reflect on some polls off of social media and an email sent in from our listener! 

Recorded March 2, 2018

Gene Sequence - Ep. 80

There was a feeling of macabre this week as we came face to face with our own mortality... but not in a literal sense.  We looked within the depths of our souls and asked the ultimate question: how do we feel about death?  What is death?  Why does it occur the way it does?  Are we pleased with how people die?

Of course, we didn't mean real humans, but rather video game deaths!  Celeste was the main game we all played this week, discussing Madeline's summit to the top of a mountain as she wrangles with her own debilitating mental faculties.  Within that context, we decided to focus on the concept on death in video games, and how it is explored mechanically-speaking.  We drew upon many influences in the video gaming world, as we all had different facets of death to explore and explain.  From there, we spent time discussing a few social media polls, a weird and ludicrous interview, a Bio Break involving real-life chimeras, and some random video game adventures amongst the crew.  Be prepared to ask yourself at the end of the episode, "How do I feel about death?" In a video game only, of course.

Recorded February 23, 2018

Cuddle Fish - Ep. 79

A building stands tall, defiant of its ancient red bricks beginning to crumble under the stress of weather.  It stands three stories high, with columns and rows of windows littered on the walls.  The window at the bottom right is cracked in multiple places, but manages to stay attached to its wooden frame.  The stone staircase has been weathered by the elements, yet it stands, offering a way to the boarded-up door.  There is a sign hanging from the door, but the words are not visible from far away.  Off to the side, is a shed caved into itself, no longer of use to anyone. 
Surrounding the once-populated structure is a group of tall, dark trees, unaware of the secret they hide.  A single dove can be heard cooing in a nearby tree, yet cannot be seen.  The ground is overgrown with various species of plants, covering any exposed inch of dirt save one small, fresh trail where presumably a deer tromped through.  Bugs can be seen skittering across the unmarked path, darting from one side to the other to avoid being exposed and ultimately preyed upon.
A group of four people slowly come into view in front of the building, crouching as they walk to be on their guard and remain less exposed.  They form a line, and follow the leader through the foliage and on the trail to the stone stairs.  The back two stay at the bottom and look around, feeling on edge while wielding their makeshift wooden spears.  The leader keeps watch atop the stairs while another begins to pry apart the wood holding the door closed.  They hear a guttural growl off in the distance, forcing the four to look frantically for the potential and eventual danger.  The door is almost free of the wood blocking entrance into it, but one wood piece continues to elude them.  They pull and pull, but can not pry it free, no matter what they try.  The growl grows louder, as the sound draws closer.  The two at the bottom grip their spears tightly, steeling themselves for what will emerge from the copse of trees.  The fourth manages to finally pry the last board off of the door, and opens it.  They hurry into the marble hallway and slam the door shut.  The two with the spears begin to look for anything heavy to shove in front of the entrance door.  A strong blow hits the door, blowing it open.  The four stand frozen, staring at the doorway, and what walks through.
On this week’s episode of the Chompcast, we wrap up our final thoughts regarding Monster Hunter World and Shadow of the Colossus.  We discuss Nintendo and our current thoughts regarding thes re-releasing games from previous systems, bolstered by listener responses.  Morgan shares a few listener polls he ran on Instagram, and we share our opinions on a Bio Break article of scientists discovering the mechanism used by Cuttlefish and Octopi to protrude spikes from their skin.

Recorded February 16, 2018

Save the Princesses! - Ep. 78

Exiting the temple, you hop onto your horse.  You speed off into the landscape, wind sweeping your hair around.  You feel the anxiety hit you, overwhelming you as you rush into a canyon.  You feel claustrophobic as the rocky walls of the limestone and granite slowly close in on you. You push through, as there is no time to waste.  You come out and are surrounded by a rocky enclosure.  In the middle of a clearing, you see a monstrous entity, towering over you and blocking out the sun.  Your horse neighs in fear.  Your eyes widen, but you temper your fear.  You grip the sword at your waist tighter.  Steeling your nerves, you hop off of your horse, ready to slay the colossus.

What an episode this week became!  We discussed romance in video games, which included some listener polls.  The topic was inspired by our game that we played, Shadow of the Colossus.  Next, we discuss a Bio Break article touching on differences in passion between American and South Asian relationships.  We delve more into Monster Hunter World, and Shea briefly talks about the last of his time with Horizon Zero Dawn.  Come listen and thanks as always for being a part of the community.

Recorded February 9, 2018

Deviljho, King of the Definitely Not Just Dinosaurs - Ep. 77

Giant beasts roam the landscape, roaring their loud roars as they claim their territories.  Creatures fly overhead, with gusts of wind flowing from their massive wing spans.  Small creatures dart from bush to tree, looking to forage for food while avoiding the monstrous entities.  The overgrowth hides secrets of the forests.  Within them, there are monster hunters that slink through, hoping to achieve glory by slaying the creatures.

Another action-packed episode of the Chompcast is filled this week, as we first discuss our time together playing Fortnite.  We discuss game delays and how they impact the gaming landscape.  The first big game of the year has dropped: Monster Hunter World.  The crew is fully invested into playing it.  Shea talks about his week with playing more Horizon Zero Dawn.  Morgan shares some reader comments regarding a community question with Battlefront 2.  Lastly, the crew discusses a biology article regarding the axolotl and scientists discovering the axolotl genome.

Recorded February 2, 2018

All Life Bows - Ep. 76

Troubling. Troubling is the mind when one delves deep into the inner workings of the brain. Getting lost in thought can lead one to freefall, down…down…down… It feels like a never-ending chasm that can spiral endlessly. Despair can overtake the heartiest person. All it takes is one event to completely alter a person forever. One heartbreak, one death, one violation of the body, one violation of the soul. No one is safe from the devices that can imbue a person with a touch of madness.

Madness is what we feel this week as we have SO MANY TOPICS to cover ranging from what soundtracks mean to gaming and us, the Nintendo Labo, Fortnite with the crew, Morgan’s time with Inpatient, Josh’s laundry list of games he played over the week, and a Bio Break article guaranteed to make your skin crawl. Are you ready for the next episode? We surely hope so.

The Weakest of Things - Ep. 75

"Kissing is messy."
- Morgan Barnes

Join us this week as we discuss the rise of the battle royale genre, Shea's final thoughts on Hellblade: Senua's Sacrifice, an article about differences in musicians' brains, and why Morgan thinks girls are icky.

Recorded January 19, 2018

Bug Nuts - Ep. 74

BOOM!

Big explosions illuminate the night sky as a cavalcade of people are stopped in the middle of the street, awe etched onto their stony faces.  Their eyes reflect the dazzling array of colors as their ears are filled with a chorus of bursts.  The smell of gunpowder fills the air, tantalizing the viewers into a state of nostalgia, as emotions and memories flood them reminding them of a time of childlike innocence and wonder.

In a barren field, about a half of a mile away from the procession of people, there are heaps of artillery shell tubes.  They are towering and grand, offering balls of light to the night sky.  Laid out in uniformity of rows and columns, the mini cannons await with eager jubilation to be of use.  Whirling around them with lighted sticks, four people ignite the fireworks.  The movement of lighting and escaping to safety in choreographed repetition appears to be an interpretive dance, conveying deeper and complex feelings for the world.  Their faces gleam in the fading light of the fireworks.

This year starts out with a bang for Swordchomp!  We start off 2018 with a packed episode of the Chompcast, eager to make this year our year.  Joining us for the first Chompcast episode of 2018 is one of our dear friends, Rich Meister, a fun and intelligent fellow of destructoid.com.  We discuss eight of the games we are most excited for in 2018, and we briefly mention the Nintendo Direct released at the beginning of the year.  Prey and Nier: Automata are both games on our mind as we have finished them over our break, as we reflect on the positives and negatives of both.  We include a Bio Break article that discussed two separate studies that investigate male insects that lose legs become more sexually successful as they invest more resources into their testes.

Recorded January 12, 2018

Chompcast Game of the Year 2017 - Day 2 Part 2

You are all sitting in your velvet-colored seats, having just returned from intermission of the first half of the awards show. This is the moment you all have been waiting for: the Game of the Year announcements. Your hosts, Fish, Josh, Morgan, and Shea, prepare their personal top 5 lists of their games they loved this year. The big finale is their debate on what the Swordchomp top 5 Games of the Year should be. There are some expected choices, as well as some huge curveballs. Thank you for your unending support this past year. Enjoy the last Chompcast of the year, and have a great New Year’s!

Chompcast Game of the Year 2017 - Day 2 Part 1

You are all sitting in your velvet-colored seats, having just returned from intermission of the first half of the awards show. This is the moment you all have been waiting for: the Game of the Year announcements. Your hosts, Fish, Josh, Morgan, and Shea, prepare their personal top 5 lists of their games they loved this year. The big finale is their debate on what the Swordchomp top 5 Games of the Year should be. There are some expected choices, as well as some huge curveballs. Thank you for your unending support this past year. Enjoy the last Chompcast of the year, and have a great New Year’s!

Chompcast Game of the Year 2017 - Day 1 Part 2

Ladies and gentlemen, the time is here. Please don your beautiful, elegant dresses and your snazziest tuxedos. Wear your fanciest ties and put on your best make-up. Rent a limousine, bring your exclusive tickets, and walk down the red carpet to the Daggertooth Awards, Swordchomp’s Game of the Year event!

We run through many categories of the first day of two, such as favorite character haircut, favorite character of 2017 you’d like to have a drink with, game of 2017 that best describes your sex life, favorite ecology, favorite character, favorite art direction, favorite boss, best sound design, favorite narrative, favorite gameplay mechanic, favorite soundtrack, favorite game this year that wasn’t released in 2017, and favorite gaming moment of 2017. Afterwards, we decide which games or characters get the coveted Daggertooth awards!

Come join the longest show in Chompcast history in all of its edited and unedited splendor, and please return tomorrow for day two of the Daggertooth Awards!

Also, any music enclosed from video games, we do not own.

Chompcast Game of the Year 2017 - Day 1 Part 1

Ladies and gentlemen, the time is here. Please don your beautiful, elegant dresses and your snazziest tuxedos. Wear your fanciest ties and put on your best make-up. Rent a limousine, bring your exclusive tickets, and walk down the red carpet to the Daggertooth Awards, Swordchomp’s Game of the Year event!

We run through many categories of the first day of two, such as favorite character haircut, favorite character of 2017 you’d like to have a drink with, game of 2017 that best describes your sex life, favorite ecology, favorite character, favorite art direction, favorite boss, best sound design, favorite narrative, favorite gameplay mechanic, favorite soundtrack, favorite game this year that wasn’t released in 2017, and favorite gaming moment of 2017. Afterwards, we decide which games or characters get the coveted Daggertooth awards!

Come join the longest show in Chompcast history in all of its edited and unedited splendor, and please return tomorrow for day two of the Daggertooth Awards!

Also, any music enclosed from video games, we do not own.